Always
by MissKEverdeen
Summary: Katniss was the one in the Capitol. not peeta. Now she has to try and survive but there's a surprise twist that will leave everyone wondering what's going to happen. violence,manybe some language and other stuff.
1. Chapter 1

**Always**

**Chapter 1**

**This is my new Fanfiction! This is a full story not a one shot like my other Fanfiction's. Now the thing is with this story there is a twist in a few chapters which will decide if you like this Fanfiction or not but I can't tell you what it is so I will be updating in a couple of days to get you to the twist and you can then decide if you like it. There is violence in the story and maybe some language and other things but I will warn you in my author's notes of anything like that. In this story Katniss is in the capitol not Peeta after catching fire.**

**There is VIOLENCE in this chapter. I do not own the hunger games.**

I lay on the ice cold metal bed like table I'd made my home on for the last two months. I've been in this hell hold for whole two months. The room I had to stay in was quite simple; it was like a hospital room but a bit more high tech. My 'bed' was centred in the middle, parallel to the large glass wall that faced out onto the corridor. Anyone could look in on me whenever they wanted to. I knew by the few walks I was permitted at the start of my capture that down the hall was my fellow victors; Johanna, Annie, and Enobaria. I stared at the plain white walls across from my bed, the room was so clean and clear it made me nauseas, I could still smell the powerful sent of bleach. Machines stood like guards at my sides. The quite buzzing the only sound I could hear from the whole room. Wires and tubes protruded from my body. They were for anything and everything; from monitoring my heart rate, to a tube designed to give me a single dose of morphling to send me to sleep from the push of a button. The second I had refused to eat the stuck another in me, the white fluid pumped its way into my system.

Mindlessly, my fingertips tapped against the metal. My eyes caught the shadows moving towards the glass wall and I heard the gruff voice of the man I wished so badly to kill. "How is she doing?" he asked, clearly not expecting anything interesting to come out of the overly stuck up doctor. "Her condition is stable" he replied, he gave the president a wide smile.

"Good" Snow raised his hand up to the keypad on the side of the door and swiftly pressed in the password. The access sound beeped from the sound box above the entrance and he pushed door open widely. "Hello Miss Everdeen" he beamed, spreading out his arms as if we were old friends reunited. When actually the last time I saw him was yesterday morning when he did his last check up on my 'condition'. "Do you feel well?" he asked, walking around my bed to get the chair from the opposite side of the room. He dragged it along behind him, the metal legs scrapping along the tiled floor, giving out an ear wrenching screech that made me flinch. "Fine" I answered him as cheerfully as I could mange. I gave him a small smile, but I could in his eyes he didn't buy it.

"I hear you've been feeling very sick lately" he inquired, placing the chair down and sitting with his elbows on the rests and hands buddle together in front of him. He looked evil; like he was planning my doom which I'm sure he was or has done.

"Yes" I watched him tentatively as I talked. "The doctor said I was having reactions to the stuff you were giving me, so he's now giving me some medicine to combat the nausea" I mused fingering the same tube I was talking of.

"Well, we can't let the Mockingjay get sick can we" he mocked, he stood to leave.

"What are you going to do with me Snow" I asked out loud.

He froze. I had asked this same question countless times in the last few months. He never answered of course. He turned round; his horridly plump lips curled up in what I guessed he thought was a friendly smile. He would have killed me all ready wouldn't he, or was that his plan get me healthy than kill me there in front of all of Panem. In front of Peeta and Gale, in front of my family.

"I want you to help me Miss Everdeen in stopping the revolution". My eyes narrowed.

"I will never help you" I said calmly, though my first thoughts were to shout or scream.

"On the contrary, at some point you will see all of this from my side" He smiled again. "You will fight for my side Miss Everdeen" he gave me one last smile before leaving.

"Never" I whispered to myself. My eyes returned to the wall opposite me as my brain began to wonder. What could he possibly do? What could he possibly have to make me change my side in this war? Everyone I love is safe, well from what I know. Snow had made me re-watch the destruction of my home, the bombs that fell when I destroyed the force field in the arena and the raging flames that engulfed district 12. The only way I knew my family was safe were the films of them and everyone else from district 13 that were broadcast all over Panem. What could he possibly have?

I shook my head trying to get the thoughts out of my head. The last seconds of the quarter quell replaying throughout.

_*Flashback*_

"_Peeta" I screamed as the sparks rained down from above._

"_Katniss" he called back. He appeared from the darkness of the trees. He leaped forward capturing my face in his hands and holding me there. Ours eyes swept over each other not need words as I saw the emotion behind the sparkling blue depths of his eyes. "Katniss..." He whispered leaning in closer, our noses barely touching. But before I could hear what he was going to say I felt the iron grip around my waist, the constricting metal pulling me like a rag doll into the air away from the boy with the bread. "No" I screamed, feeling the material of my jacket tear under the grasp of Peeta's strong hands my Mockingjay pin along with it._

_*End of Flashback*_

That was the last I saw of him, the look of pain on his face as I was hoisted away to the capitol. Once I got on the hovercraft they knocked me out for the long journey. A few times I woke up dazed before falling unconscious once again. Foggy Memories of a cushioned seat on the journey, Snow's face looking down on me, being placed on the bed. The only thing I really remember fully was being on a hospital bed in a large bright lit room, surrounded by capitol people in white coats. I didn't have enough time to understand what was going on before I was off again. When I asked snow he said I was having tests done on my heath levels. I never really questioned it after that.

The sound of beeping roused me from my thoughts and I looked up to see the light next to the sound box go from green to red. I sighed as the lights went out, knowing all too well what it meant. It was my allocated time to sleep or to try at least. My eyes stayed open waiting. Waiting for the thing I dreaded so much.

"AHHHHHHHHHahhhhhhhhhhhhhh" The first scream sounded. It was Johanna. From down the hall I heard the tidal wave of water splash over her, and the unmistakeable hum of electricity. Another scream erupted through the hallways, and I fought to keep my eyes open. Knowing if they closed even for a second I would see her. There in her room her body shaking uncontrollable, her brown eyes shut tightly when the shock went through her. They would open soon enough to shot the peacekeepers the worst look, swearing their death. Snow had forced me to watch, only once at the beginning, he wanted to give me the image so that when I heard her I could think of nothing else. She had stayed strong for so long, keeping in the screams but that made them turn up the power. She gave in when the voltage was too high for her to take. The pain I felt for her was nothing compared to what she must be feeling. All of them. It was not long before the others started. The animalistic yelps and groans which joined Johanna. It had not taken me long to figure it out. Darius and Lavinia. Enobaria and Annie were fine. Nether were hurt, I guessed Annie was here to torment Finnick and nothing else, they would never tell Annie of any plans to rescue us from the arena.

That's what we're all here for, information on the rebels. I haven't seen anyone else here. At the beginning I hoped to see Cinna again, but once I learned of what they were doing to us I quickly changed my mind. Here we are stuck on the bottom levels of the Capitol justice building; hoping for the rescue that we fear will never come.

**That's my first chapter! Please review I know it sounds like I'm evil but those are the things that happened to them in the capitol. I am over 16 by the way. There will be violence in the next chapter. Tell me what you think in a review please I need to know what you think of my Fanfiction. MissKEverdeen :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Always**

**Chapter 2**

**Please review! Thank you to everyone who reviewed my last chapter! There is VIOLENCE in this chapter. Disclaimer: I do not own the hunger games. MissKEverdeen :)**

Somehow I had managed to get some sort of sleep. After a couple of hours exhaustion took over. As soon as I woke up Snow was entering the room. The beeping stopped; my eyes squinted and I fought the urge to groan or kick at him. The bags under my eyes felt like tonnes in weight. In stubbornness I just laid there and stared at him watching me. I knew I had to stay strong and not show any emotion.

"Good morning Miss Everdeen" He said. He seemed to refuse to call me by my first name, always staying formal. I guessed it was a good thing as it would feel wrong to sound too well acquainted and friendly.

"Snow" I said flatly, assessing his expression.

"I've decided you get to have a walk today" He smiled; gesturing for me to get of my bed. I did as I was ordered and slide of my bare feet hitting the freezing cold floor. Two guards came in and stood at his back, he once again motioned this time to the door. I dared not make a run for it, not again. Like before it would take them mere seconds for them to tackle me to the floor. Whoever did it was permitted one hit. They all hated me for starting this war and putting the Capitol into chaos.

"Miss Everdeen I have an understanding that you know both of the Avox's we have here" He stated. I said nothing I didn't even look at him. "Well I thought this could help me in getting your attention" He continued bitterly. We passed another room. The door wasn't like mine it was like a metal jail cell. One of the guards typed the password into the keypad. The beeping sounded and the guard opened it easily. Snow nodded to the peacekeeper behind me. Without a word he pushed me into the room. It was of medium size not as large as mine was; my gaze instantly fell on the red headed Avox girl who was whimpering on the chair she was restrained to. The frame was constructed of metal even the chains that held her arms and legs tightly to it. Remorse shuddered through me; she was here because of me she had no use but to torture me. It was all my fault. I tried to run to her but the peacekeeper shoved me into the nearest wall. The air was knocked from my lungs on impact; my chest ached like hell as I slipped down to the ground.

I turned back to the girl who had stopped crying and was staring at me. I gulped, fearing what emotion lied behind her eyes; hatred, loathing, disgust, enjoyment in me being hurt. Instead to my surprise all I saw was sadness. Lavinia. I remembered her name it was mentioned briefly a couple of times in my stay here. "Im going to show you what happens when people don't look at things from my side" Snow said. He walked over to a panel that was connected to the chair on the far side of the room. Snow flipped a switch and the machine came to life. A man entered the room and walked over to the panel next to Snow. You could tell he didn't hold much power in the situation cause he seemed to hunch over and cower away from the President's presents. "The machines ready" He mumbled. My eyes examined the machine it was much more high tech than the one I had seen before but I guessed it had to be since I was doubtful this was going to be short. Or that the poor sweet Lavinia was going to make this out alive. She had never done anything to put herself in this position; she had already taken her punishment for trying to run, but now she was doomed she was going to die and I was sure she knew it.

"Good", Snow stated. "Start on a low setting" he ordered staring at me. The man nodded and moved a lever up a sliver, so slowly it was painful to watch. All eyes were on the girl and when the man pressed a button it started. A mangled yelp escaped her lips, one that sent me cringing into myself and shaking slightly. My pain was nothing compared to what was present on her face.

"More", Snow said simply. The lever went up another centimetre. This time her body reacted violently. Her eyes settled on me again. But once more they weren't threatening. Why didn't she hate me? Why didn't she give me hurtful looks? I had put her here. I would understand better if she did. "More!" Snow growled menacingly. The look on his face was that of impatience. He pushed the man out of the way and forced the lever up almost to the top. He's smile was greedy. Lavinia let out one last scream, one last blood curdling scream, it echoed the room not letting you escape the heart wrenching sound. She fell limp. It took me seconds to realise what had happened. She was gone. Dead. He had pushed it too far and killed her. As I stared at her lifeless body my own started to shake. Tearless sobs shook through me making my chest hurt. At least she was safe from them. At least she won't have to suffer anymore. I mentally told myself. Trying desperately to compose myself. Snow had barely noticed he was too busy yelling at the man. Guards finally dragged him away and Snow turned to me. Loudly he cleared his throat. "Well, I'm sure that's shown you something", He said. "Just how easy people die around here", without another look he left the room. The guards grabbed me by the arms and dragged me out. My eyes never left her; she still lay cold and pale in her slouched sitting position. I'm so sorry I thought as the door closed and she was gone.

**That was the chapter. I know it wasn't a very nice one, when I was reading about the Avox girl I really liked her but unfortunately she didn't make it out of the Capitol in the books. The chapter was only to show that Snow tries to manipulate Katniss. There won't be any really bad chapters like this. Please review if you want. MissKEverdeen.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Always**

**Chapter 3**

**Please review! Thank you to everyone who reviewed my last chapter!**

They led me through the hallways. The four big guards, one on every side herding me in a box formation and keeping me going. My head hung low, shoulders hunched over. I could see what they saw a girl walking like the un-dead, no emotion; no nothing. My feet barely carrying me along. The sound of Lavinia's strangled scream still ringing in my ears, repeating through my head like a broken record I wanted to burn. "We have to get here back to her room and give her, her medicine for the sickness" my doctor told the guards in front of me. The sickness, the sickness, I thought. The only sickness in me was the images of the poor dead Avox girl circling around my brain, blurring my vision.

I rolled my eyes, entering my 'cell' as I called it in my head. It hit me at that moment, the roll of nausea that sent me jolting for the bin across the room. This was worse than it had been in the last couple of weeks. Maybe it was from the fact I was standing or the walk I had taken. Once I had finished I slumped to the floor, my legs spread out in front of me. Exhaustion sweeping over. I huffed loudly my eyelids dropping slightly. What was wrong with me? I thought desperately. I'd been sick before when I was younger yes, every once and awhile I might of gone down with a cold or a fever, but I had a feeling deep down that this was very different.

Slowly I regained a part of my strength. My eyes opened lazily, met with the sight of my doctor, Snow and two guards staring down at me expectantly from the door. Sluggish, I tried to climb to my feet, relying on the wall I stood. As well as I could I made my way to my bed and slide on, having to jump slightly.

"What is wrong with me?" I groaned in Snow's direction. He came to sit on the side of my bed. My eyes followed him like a hawk.

"It's the hormones my dear Miss Everdeen" He explained. What did that mean? The doctor made his way over to me, checking the machines and pressing buttons, before reaching for my hands to connect me up to them. I flinched.

"What do you mean hormones?" I asked warily.

"Your tired lately, the sickness and I'm surprised you haven't caught on to the thing you have missed for the past two months" Snow said calmly, almost clinically. That's when it hit me; it was another jolt of sickness. This time it wasn't the need to physical be sick, no it was the hit of realisation that came over me as everyone of his words clicked into place. Ripping my hands from the doctor's grip I yanked my shirt up around my chest. Shakily, my fingertips felt the tender surface that lay over my lower abdomen. Snow smiled at me. My eyes grew wide with shock and fear. I can't be, I couldn't, I was still a...a.

"Congratulations Miss Everdeen" Snow beamed his smile wide and unashamedly happy at my horror, "Your Pregnant".

**So that's the big twist. Now you will understand why the chapter will decide whether you will keep reading or not. How she is pregnant will be explained in the next chapter but I'm sure you've all realised how. Please review and tell me what you think of the twist. Please review! By the way I'm going by what I have read on pregnancy to help me along with the story so if I make a mistake I'm sorry just tell me in a PM. MissKEverdeen :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Always**

**Chapter 4**

**Please review! Thank you to everyone who reviewed my last chapter. Please tell me what you think about how the story is going. Disclaimer I don't own the hunger games.**

"I can't be pregnant", I mumbled my fingers still brushed my belly. The things he had said made sense. The 'morning sickness', but I had never really been regular I could go a month to two months without getting my period. I felt a bit grossed out that Snow had mentioned that fact to me. "I can't be pregnant...I'm still a...a" I mumbled out loud.

"Oh, don't worry that has not changed", Snow said. I mentally cringed at the fact he knew what I was going to say. It felt even grosser to be having a conversation about this with the evil President Snow. "No", He leant in closer. "The pregnancy is by scientifically circumstances", He explained. "You see there are some people in the Capitol that are not able to have children naturally, so the scientists we have created a procedure in which they would place a fertilised egg inside a surrogate"

I listened quietly. I understood what he was telling me. My mother had told me of the rumour there was such a procedure in the Capitol when she was telling me about how far their medical treatments had progressed since the dark days. "Actually it has been around for awhile" He continued. "Our doctors can use DNA from one of the parents to create the fertilised egg", Snow smiled. The words started to slur together as I caught what he was getting at, who the only person it would make sense to be the father of my child. "Even if it's from a small trimming of hair".

"Peeta", I whispered quietly.

"Well done you worked it out", He beamed, I felt like he was talking to a small infant. "Im surprised you didn't work it out already" He said again, "Your around 2 months gone already". His eyes looked approvingly and almost proudly at my stomach. Where my child was growing. I was pregnant.

I couldn't believe it. I thought I could live through this. That I could stand anything they threw at me, being pregnant, having children is something I never wanted. It's why I don't want to marry, why I don't want to have relationships. I couldn't bear the thought of bringing my children into a world where bad people like the man sitting on my bed before me. I could never stand and watch that child be put up to die in front of the nation.

"Why?" I asked. "Why would you bother to get me pregnant?"

"Because this way you're always have part of the boy you love" he mocked. "And the child will be the face of our side" he said getting up.

"What?" I ask harshly, sitting up so fast my stomach recoiled.

"Your child will be the face of our side of the war" he said again. "To show that it's not just bad things that come out of the hunger games, and the way the Capitol is run. Your baby will be their little sign of hope"

He left the room.

My doctor walked in after him.

My eyes went out of focus; I just stared into space contemplating my situation. From the corner of my eye I saw the doctor press a button; in mere moments I felt the morphling enter my system. I fell to sleep. Into the darkness that I hoped would help me forget my situation. That I was going to have the child of the boy I cared about so so much.

**Please review and tell me what you think! MissKEverdeen :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Always**

**Chapter 5**

**Please review! Disclaimer I don't own the hunger games. I do own Emeli and any other characters I have put in to my story.**

When I woke I could feel someone standing over me. Tucking in the covers around my still body. I groaned opening my eyes. It was not snow. There in front of me was a young woman, she wore a peacekeepers uniform but her unnatural dark purple waves hung free. At second glance I realised that the uniform was not the as everyone else it was much more flattering to her curvy figure. She felt my gaze and look me in the eye.

"Good morning Miss Everdeen" she smiled. Great another primped and proper Capitol person. Surprising her smile wasn't as fake as I thought it would be, she actually looked happy and comfortable around me. I forced back the smile that threatened to surface; it was like with Peeta you had to smile back. Shaking that thought from my mind I replied.

"Who are you?" I asked.

She sat down on the chair next to my bed. "My name's Emeli" she replied, "Emeli Roberts"

"What are you doing here?" I asked. I know my mother would think me rude, asking all these questions without thinking of being polite to someone, but I think she would not care right at the time.

"Im your personal guard" she replied. "Im here to take care of you through your pregnancy"

The word made me grimace. Emeli ran her hand through her hair, she catches me looking.

"Snow thought it would be a good touch if I looked a bit more normal, less armed and careless. He thought it might make you feel more comfortable around me" she explained.

"I'm sorry but what makes you think I need a guard, Does snow think it would make it easier if it was a woman?" I snap.

She doesn't recoil from my tone; she sits there and stares at me. "Snow thought it would be best if your guard was someone who had been through this herself" she said calmly. My eyes narrow at her. "Well the pregnant part at least", she adds understanding my glare. "I have a daughter of my own. My husband was killed he was a peacekeeper also. He died before my daughter was born"

I feel a rush of sympathy for the woman before me. She couldn't be older then her early twenties and yet she had gone through so much. I know my sadness shows on my face as she looks at me before looking down at her scruffy nails. "What is her name?" I whisper looking at her face.

"Rosalie" she answers, her eyes rise back up to my own. It's only now that I notice there a beautiful emerald green. "She looks a lot like my husband, though she has my reddish hair" she smiles.

I give her a weird look. "Well my naturally reddish hair", she laughs. "Living in the Capitol you have to have one thing changed, to fit in" as she said this, Emeli turned her head, the purple waves swishing. I smile this time. It was easy to be around her, Snow would be so pleased.

"What are you supposed to do then?" I ask abruptly. "As my guard I mean"

She laughs, "Well I have to take care of you and get you ready for the interview that's tomorrow" the last part she said slowly accessing my expression.

"The what?" I said harshly.

"You will be going on a interview for the whole of Panem" she answers. "You're to explain what's going on with your pregnancy and try and gain sympathy with all the citizens, you have to stop this war"

I frown. "Katniss, I asked to be your guard" she said, "Because I wanted to help you. I'm currently in contact with the president of district 13. Everyone wants to rescue you but Coin won't let them try yet"

The moment she said District 13, my mind went to Bonnie and Twill. Then to Peeta.

"When?" I asked.

"After the interview" she said. "They haven't got their plan right now. Their still trying to get the support of the districts"

"How is everyone? Do you know how many people survived? Is my family well?" I gush. "Wait, how are you able to talk about all this? What about the camera's?" my eyes instantly look to the camera in the corner, recording my every move.

"Don't worry" she soothes. "I have someone monitoring them at the moment. We're safe"

I relax a tiny bit.

"And to answer your questions" she starts. "Your family are fine. Not many people got out, but a group were able to escape into the woods. Including your cousin Gale" she gives me an all too knowing smile. I ignore it the best I can. "I'll try and get you more news later"

"Thank you" I whisper.

"You're welcome" she smiles.

**Please review and tell me what you think! I want to know what you think of my new character! Thank you for reading. Hope you enjoyed the chapter. MissKEverdeen:)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Always**

**Chapter 6**

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed my last chapter! please review!**

Emeli and I had spent nearly all of yesterday talking. She had told me all about her daughter and what had happened to her husband. He was killed in a one of riot started in one of the Districts. At the time Emeli was in her third trimester of pregnancy and was not able to go with him. When she got the horrible news it sent her into a premature labour.

Her Rosalie was now five. She had gotten pregnant out of marriage at the age of 17 and they rushed to get married. They were only legally together for around four months when he died.

Now we sat waiting for Snow to give her orders. I was meant to go to one of the preparation rooms to get ready for the interview I have tonight. It was live in front of the whole of Panem and I was terrified. I lay on the bed staring at the walls, an eerie silence filled the room.

"We have to go" Emeil whispered. I nodded and jumped of the bed. We walked through the hallways in silence. Everywhere I looked guards stood, the helmets obscured their faces from my eyes. We came to a room. Emeli pressed in the code. We went in to find Snow standing there waiting for us. "Good morning Miss Everdeen" he smiled.

"Snow" I said. He motioned to the guard at the door. I don't look around but the moment the all too familiar voice flooded my ears, I turned on my heel as fast as I could. "My dear Katniss" the voice called.

"Cinna" I smiled. We met in a hug that made me feel so at home.

"Cinna will be getting you prepared for tonight. Remember what I told you Cinna" Snow interrupted us, before leaving the room. Cinna grabbed my hand and led me over the small raised circle in the middle of the room. I step onto it, still gripping hand. He gave me what looked like a forced smile. Looking at him better now I saw how skinny he was. At close I could see a thin scar curving around his left eye. There was a bruise beginning to form on his right check and his bottom lip was busted open. He did his best to ignore my staring. Cinna gave me a twirl. "You've grown" he stated.

"Yes" I frown.

"Well let's get you ready and changed" he smiled.

I had to have a bath and got adorned in scented lotions. He led me over to one of the Plush armchairs and did my nails, make-up, hair and eyebrows. I was just happy that i didn't have to have waxing done. It would have killed at the moment.

"So what masterpiece have you got me to wear this time?" I asked. "There's no fire or leotards are there?" I mocked half heartedly.

"No" he smiled. "Snow wants you to be the picture of the 'expecting mother' full of innocence and nurturing instincts"

I snort. Innocent and nurturing? He pulled me back of to the middle of the room, standing there in my underwear while he got a long light pink dress out of a plastic dress bag. I raised my arms and he slipped it over me. I laughed as the soft silky dress slipped over my skin and down to the floor. Cinna cinched a ribbon of the same material around my mid chest and tightened it into a bow on my back.

"Would you like to see what you look like?" he asked. I nodded. We walked over to the set of mirrors. I was speechless. My hair was up. The front was pulled into an intricate but delicate braid that haloed my head, and pulled in at the nape of my neck. The rest was pinned. Cinna had picked a light pink dress that cascaded down in layers to my feet. It had a neck line that sweep along my collar bone. I looked breathtaking.

"Thank you" I whispered. He smiled. "I'm so sorry for all of this"

"Katniss don't worry I chose this" he dismissed. "Now remembers Girl on fire" he kissed both my cheeks before a guard came in to take him out. My heart fell heavy as he disappeared from view. Would I ever see him again? Would Cinna be included in the rescue mission?

Before I could think. Emeli was in front of me.

"I have something for you" she whispered, reaching into her pockets. She pulled out a golden chain with something on the end of it. I held out my hand and she placed it on my palm. I smiled. It was Peeta's pearl. My last gift. The impermeable white pearl gleamed from inside a tight fixed gold net. "This way your always have a way of remembering another reason your doing this" I handed it back to her, she done it up around my neck. I held it tightly in my hand.

"Thank you" I whispered. Quickly I tucked it under my dress.

"Your welcome" she smiled. Holding out her hand for me to take. "It's time"

**That's the chapter! please review and tell me what you think. MissKEverdeen:)**


	7. Chapter 7

**Always**

**Chapter 7**

**Thank you to everyone that reviewed my last chapter! This is really short, I'm sorry.**

**Peeta pov**

Everyone was called to Command. All but me. I knew something was happening, something to do with Katniss that I wasn't supposed to see. I followed slowly, what was it? Was she died? Men were crowding into the large room, all focused on the screens. Cautiously I entered the room. The screens lit up. Moments later the good old Caesar Flickerman was greeting us all to one of his interviews.

"Tonight, we have an extremely extinguished guest" he smiled. "This girl captured our hearts and took our breath away from the moment she volunteered for her sweet sister, everyone it is the one and only Miss Katniss Everdeen!" he yelled out to the now cheering crowd.

My breath caught. There she was, still undeniably beautiful. Draped in pink flowing material and prepped for the awaiting Capitol citizens. My eyes scanned her clinically for anything bad; a bruise, a cut. I still didn't relax. The crowd in command hadn't tried to drag me out, they all knew that out everyone I was the one who had the most right to see this. Still I ignored their assessing eyes and kept all my attention on the radiant creature on the TV screen. At this moment she was getting through the conventional Capitol greeting, she swiftly kissed both his cheeks and complied with a loose hug. I half chuckled at the thoughts that must be going on behind that carefully constructed mask of a smile. The real Katniss would have moaned about it or groaned audibly in my ear if I was beside her. She sat down with grace and continued to smile into the crowd.

"It's lovely to see you again Miss Everdeen" he grinned. Only up close would anyone be able to comprehend how fake he was.

"thank you for having me" Katniss answered.

"Well, we have a lot to talk about, let's crack on" he sat back, and motioned to the audience. "I think the thing we're all most intrigued about is your pregnancy"

At that second I saw it, the falter in the smile. Mere moments and it was gone, a quick dust off, of her dress and the mask was moved back in place. I was sure I was the only one that saw it.

Snow knows that was a lie, why would they still force her to play along when there really was no baby?

"Yes" she nodded.

"at the moment your currently in what? Your third month of pregnancy?" he questioned.

"Yes" she nodded again.

"But your barely showing?" he asked.

"Well yes, I was scared about this fact as well. It has been told to me that the stress of the last Hunger games and of course the change of environment temporarily damaged the growth of the foetus" Katniss said sadly, throwing a horribly distraught expression into the audience. Loud gasps and sympathetic sounds were heard in the background.

Even she looked truly upset. Shouldn't they have come up with an excuse, a way out of the lie? But her she was going along with the situation I had blurted out on impulse.

"Oh my goodness! Please tell us everything is ok now" he pleaded.

"Yes, thanks to President Snow and the amazing medical advances" she answered.

"Thank goodness" Caesar smiled.

They continued to talk about her life in the Capitol but I had no interest in the lies they were spinning.

"Why is she going along with this lie?" I asked sternly.

Coin looked at me once, before turning to the guards. "Soldier Mellark, we have some information that up until now you weren't at liberty to know"

My lips set into a hard line, "And what is this news?"

"Snow had a secret punishment put under way, encase our dear Miss Everdeen somehow survived the 75th Hunger games" she answered. I nodded for her to continue. "The plan was that they would give her the very thing she lied she already had; a child"

Guards around the room seemed to tense, ready for any reaction on my part. "Are you telling me that she really is pregnant?" there was a slight anger to my tone that ordered the guards to come forward a step.

"Indeed, Miss Everdeen is two months pregnant. With your child" it couldn't be, we had never been together. There was no way she could have my child.

"How?" I asked.

"There are ways in the Capitol, ways for citizens who cannot conceive natural to bare kids of their own. Scientist used parts of your DNA, they were able to secure from your many prepping times to create a fertilised egg. Which then was placed in Katniss"

"She's pregnant, with my child" I choked. I had always dreamt of one day, marrying Katniss and starting a family. But I never thought it would work like this, her captured in the Capitol. Forced to bare my child. She was pregnant, my Katniss was pregnant.

**Please review! The more reviews I get the faster I update and the longer the reviews the happier and more motivated I am. MissKEverdeen:)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Always**

**Chapter 8**

**Please review! Thank you to everyone who reviewed my last chapter. Especially to Thalia Mellark your review made me smile like mad! I'm feeling the pressure to make the story good. Hopefully I won't disappoint. By the way if you haven't already checked out my other stories please read them and tell me what you think. MissKEverdeen:)**

I returned to my room, with Emeli, by my side. She told me I did good. That snow shouldn't have to much against it, but I still had to keep going. It was late, and I was made to sleep. Hours later when consciousness roused me again, I felt Emeli at my side. My eyes opened to find her staring down at me with a soft smile. One that reminded me of how my mother used to look at me, doting.

"Has snow said anything?" I asked in a raspy voice. I sat up hastily, Emeli reached out to help me sit up properly. Instinctively, my hand cradled my stomach as I nestled into the wide pillow I rested on.

"He's coming to see you in about 10 minutes" she answered with a soothing smile. "But I must talk to you now"

Her tone sent my already unsettled stomach into knots.

"What?" I asked in an alarmed tone.

"Peeta saw you interview" she answered, her ever accessing eyes analysing my reaction.

"What did he do? Does he know about _the_ child?" I asked. I still wasn't able to bring myself to say _our _child. It felt too weird; I couldn't completely deal with the fact that I was in fact pregnant, but with Peeta's child. That was way to much to think about.

"He was angry that they hadn't tried to rescue you, he got angry at Coin" she answered.

"What about the whole child thing? Does he know I'm pregnant?"

"Yes, that's why he has ordered to step up the rescue mission. They should be coming in about a week, it might be a bit more, they inform me closer to the date, but for now we have to keep you safe and our of harm"

We sat there in silence. The doors opened and my doctors and snow walked in. he motioned for Emeli to leave with a wave of his hand. She nodded and went to leave when I stopped her. "No, can she stay? Please!" I asked.

Snow gave him Emeli a look of distaste. "Fine, she can stay"

I felt angry at the way he stared at her. She was a loving woman; she actually seemed to care about people. I guess that's why he didn't like her, she undermined his violent ways.

"Miss Everdeen, Well done for complying with the interview" he started, his tone still was not sincere. "But unfortunately, it was not enough. The revolution rages on, not faltered at all"

"The revolution would not fix itself overnight. What did you think showing me off, making me lie to them all would magically turn them on your side" I hissed.

"Miss Everdeen, I would advise you not to try my patience. We all know I have my ways of enforcing your co-operation"

I flinched at the thought of the dead girl; her death was all my fault. Would he kill someone else? Darius? Joanna? Annie? Cinna?

"Please, don't kill anyone else" I begged.

He gave me a bitter grimace. "No" he said, "I think it would do good to show you what I can do again"

He gripped my arm, dragging me out of the bed. I yelped at his painful steel grip around my arm. I was forced to try my best to support myself as he led me out of the room and down the hall.

"Let go of her" Emeli screamed.

He did as he was told and pushed me into her arms. I panted like mad, clutching onto her frame. She stroked my hair "It's ok, it's ok" she whispered to me.

Snow opened one of the doors; he wrenched me from her arms and threw me through the door. I looked up tentatively and gasped in shock at what I saw in front of me.

**Please review and tell me what you think. There might be violence in the next chapter, I will try and write the least I can, anyway thank you for reading! MissKEverdeen:) **


	9. Chapter 9

**Always**

**Chapter 9**

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed my last chapter! Thank you to Thalia Mellark for TWO reviews, they made me smile so much and really motivated me to write more. I hope you all like the chapter, there is VIOLENCE in this chapter.**

I pulled myself to my feet, aided heavily by Emily behind me. I stared in horror at the site in front of me. Darius sat like Lavinia, in the middle of the room. But unlike the dead Avox girl he wasn't linked to any machine, he wasn't even sobbing. He sat bruised and bloodied, his right eye unable to open from the purple swell of his bludgeoned eyelid. The, what used to be swift curve of his nose was now crooked and obviously broken. The brownish red dried blood ran in streams from his nose and broken lip.

Only at second glance, when my eyes drifted, almost dreading the rest of him, did I realise he was shirtless. The once so unashamed man's hands were bound behind his back, I assumed to the back of the metal chair that he was sat on. Cuts and bruises marred the surface of his chest. I feared what his back looked like, and mentally cringed at the thoughts of exactly how he got all these marks. My stomach once again contorted into tightened knots, my insides doing multiple flips. I was sure that I would find out too soon. I felt a hard hand on my back, the force of the palm sent me to the floor, this time right in front of Darius. His eyes, found mine and we didn't need words. The tears threatened my eyes. I knew it was visible to him, as with one quick shake of his head and hard look of his eyes the message was sent; No tears, No anything.

I wanted to hug him, to comfort him. But I couldn't. We both knew that my presents meant this was the last time I would see him. I got to my feet and stood up, backing up. Guards came in from all sides and this was it, this was the end for him.

Hours went by, but I felt like days on end. Every punch, every kick, every infliction of any kind of pain on his part sent me recoiling further into myself. Each yelp reactively sent the tears back down into me. I could cry, he had told me not to and I would honour his wish.

In his finally moments he sent me a finally look, the last time I would ever see him. I sent him one back; one of sorrow. Then just before it was up, his lips curved into a smile, like he would give me whenever he would tease me or offer a kiss for a squirrel. The good memory of him would be etched in my mind forever, and like he meant it to be. It was a good one, though he was in a horrid state he was still there even now.

My eyes closed instantly. His last yelp sounded and I felt Emily's arms embrace me. She turned me away from what I was sure was what Snow wanted me to see. That was not how I was going to remember him. With a tight and reassuring grasp on my hand Emily lead me out of the room and down the hall to my room.

That was until the meaty hands grabbed me from around my waist and away from her. "No" I screamed. She lunged for me, but she too was dragged out of my reach. My feet left the floor and I started kicking out in any direction. Snow walked around to look me in the eyes.

"I'm sure that reaffirmed your take on this war, Miss Everdeen" he smiled.

The need to kick him, to spit in his face, even to give him the death glare was too great. "Your horrid" I spat, "Do you not care? About anything but yourself and keeping your stupid control over a messed up world. Do you not have any respect or decency? You disgust me!" I screamed.

He looked taken aback for it must have been around two seconds before his expression turned murderous. "Your not doing yourself any favours Miss Everdeen" he seethed; he ripped from my captures arms and dragged me down to my room. Throwing me towards the bed. "You are doing all of this yourself. It is all your fault!"

He shut the door, locked it and walked away. Seconds later the lights went out, plunging me into darkness. I sat there in complete silence not able to see a thing contemplating his words. He was right; all of it was my fault. Lavinia, daruis.

It's not long before the screaming starts, this time Johanna is alone in her torment. Does she know anything, about me, about the rescue and Coin? What was I going to do now.

**That's the chapter! Please review and tell me what you think. The more chapters and the longer the chapters the quicker I update. MissKEverdeen:)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Always**

**Chapter 10**

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed my last chapter! I know that chapter was a bit hard to read. Lots of you have asked to read more about Emeli and I thought you should get to know my own character. Please review! it was really hard to write this, mostly because of the amazing feedback is making me really really nervous and scared about updating encase it sucks really really bad! MissKEverdeen:)**

I had been a week, a whole week. It was evident there was not going to be a rescue mission anytime soon, as the days ticked my slowly I began to worry it never would. Snow had forbidden anyone from visiting me; none came to see me or even walked past my cell. The cell that felt like it was closing in on me with every second. The only sign of life I had seen in days was one guard, a twenty something, extremely well built man, who routinely came to deliver my meals; all of which was served with stale bread.

It didn't matter, I ate nothing. Not even my doctors were able to visit me; they had stopped the drugs that gave me relief from my ever present and steady morning sickness. Luckily, my many starving years in district 12 had prepared me for this. The smell of food sent me jolting for the bin. Resulting in me curling up in the corner, silent and sweating as the rolls of nausea rippled through me, round after everlasting round.

I was sure he was enjoying this; the cameras were all trained on me like watch dogs. I knew he was watching me, his greedy grim smile beaming as he enjoyed every second.

The lights had continued to turn on and off as usual, the screaming followed as if on cue. Snow was truly mad, when would he let me see Emeli? I need someone by my side. I desperately wanted to know why there was no rescue.

He was punishing me, was that why there was no rescue? They wouldn't be able to get to me? Or was it just that Coin didn't think I was worth the hassle? I kind of agreed. But I craved to be out of here, to be with family and Peeta. To explain to him what he means to me and discuss what this baby would mean to us and our lives. My 'baby bump' was beginning to show, my abdomen curved into a noticeable round. My hand stroked the now firmer surface, trying to sooth my stomach.

At my count I was almost half way through my third month, but to me that meant nothing to me about what I was going through. Would Peeta love our child? Even though he didn't conceive this child?

My chest felt to tender for me to move and I still had the numb stupor of sleeplessness hanging over me. I was so tired but I couldn't sleep.

Finally the access sound beeped and I felt the cool air from outside breeze past my heated skin. My eyes opened and drifted to the doorway. I didn't even have enough energy to give the familiar loving woman a thankful smile. She didn't care; she walked straight over to me and knelt down at my side. The back of her hand came to feel my forehead, though I was sure she was as warm as usual her skin felt freezing against mine.

"I'm so sorry" she whispered, "I wanted so badly to help you but he wouldn't let me come"

"It's all my fault Emeli" I croaked. She shook her head but I wasn't having her sympathy. My hand came up to her arms that were wrapping around my waist to help me up, at my grasp she looked up into my eyes. "It's the truth, I did all of this. If I had chosen differently...if I had died in that retched arena in the first place" my voice went low, thoughtful.

Her hands gripped my arms tightly, holding me away from the wall and giving me a small but assertive shake. "Now don't you dare say that Katniss, don't you ever say that" she ordered forcefully, "don't you see what he's doing? He wants this; he wants you to think this"

Her words hit me like a ton of bricks, like a train slamming into me at a hundred miles an hour; that's what he was doing, and by hell it was working. "It's the truth" I whispered in a broken voice.

Another shake and she has my full attention again, "No, no. It is not, do you hear me? Do you hear what I am saying?" all I do is stare into those emerald green eyes, clouded with worry and sadness, all of which was wiped away with undeniable certainty. The kind that comes when you know some is so true. "If you did anything it was light a spark Katniss, this war was started years ago, decades back. It started with the first hunger games, and honey I have such certainty that the one you were just in will be the last"

She wraps me in a hug, such mothering radiates from her it feels hard not believe everything she has said. Slowly, she pulls back and places a hand on either side of my face, holding me so I couldn't look away. "Katniss, you are so much better than him, you are so much stronger that you think you are. Over all through everything you have been through you, i am so proud of you, and I know for a fact that your sister and your mother our also so proud; so very, very proud. Do not let him destroy you. Don't let him destroy your soul like he has to so many others before you"

Silence falls upon the room, without a word she smiles at me. i return with a weak somewhat hesitate smile. Gently, she helps me up and walks me over to the bed. My strength once again falls, as I scoot myself onto the cold metal. After i am safely on and comfortable she leaves for a second to get a small metal bowl and cloth.

I sigh as she leans on the side of my bed and softly wipes away the droplets of sweat from my face. "Tell me more about your life here?" I asked quietly. Her eyes are accessing.

"What?" she said.

"I want to know more about your life, your husband, your daughter, why you chose to become a peacekeeper even though everything" I explained. She had given me a small amount of information before but not enough for me to truly understand her.

She gives a breathy laugh a nods amused before beginning her story. "Well, you of why I married" she said.

"But there has to be more to the story than that?" I questioned.

"Fine, well. I was training to be a peacekeeper, my parents thought it was a respectable job and it meant that I would be able to protect my brother Emmett, he's also a guard here" she rinsed the cloth and brought out a hairbrush. Untying my hair from the loose and mess braid it hung in over my shoulder, and running the hard bristles through my tangled mane.

"When I was on one of the military courses I met this charming officer, Damon. We spent a lot of time together, and one day he asked me out. You must know where it went from there" she laughed playfully, motioning to my rounded belly. I would have blushed if I hadn't been for the fact that I was still boiling already. "When I told him of my pregnancy, he told me it was perfect. That it fit right in with what he always wanted; a true family. He got down on one knee and that was that. We got married and were planning to buy a bigger house; we both wanted more than one child"

I smiled up at her, there love sounded amazing. Moments later her face turned sad, "but then the riots began" she whispered.

"And he died" I finished. She nodded.

"One of the districts thought it was about time for a revolution, but they didn't have enough people, enough weapons. Peacekeepers intervened and the rebels at the time took it on themselves to fight. My Damon was killed in an explosion at one of the factories"

Again the room went quiet, my hand reached for hers. "At least you still have your daughter" I said.

This made her smile, "Yes, my dear Rose is everything to me. Every time she smiles I see a bit of him, he had these obscenely adorable dimples in both cheeks that she luckily inherited" she stopped brushing and was practically beaming from ear to ear. "The reason I carried on with my job because I wanted to help, I wanted to find away to stop the way Panem is run. I wanted to make it a peaceful place for my daughter to grow up, for her to be proud of where and who she is. To be proud of me as a mother"

"Believe me, she must be proud to have such an amazing mother" I assured.

At that second the doors opened, I just about jumped of the bed at the sound of the access beep. We both turned to see the man with my meals. I became uncomfortable around him; he gave me a mutual uneasy look when he placed the tray down. The man turned to Emeli and gave her a blank stare, "Snow wants to speak with the patient" oh so that's what I was, a patient to Snow.

"Katniss, this is my brother Emmett" Emeli said, giving me a smile. My gaze went back to the man and I was sure my face was the picture of surprise. Her laugh echoed the room, "He's not very talkative"

Emmett's expression turned hostile, "at least not to people like you" he defended himself.

"Emmett!" Emeli hissed. He turned back to her.

"What she is the reason for all this trouble" he motioned to me with a carless wave of his large hand. I recoiled into myself. It was annoying how the words from a person I had only just met could make me hate myself even more. "You're putting yourself in danger to help her!"

My eyes snapped to the cameras. "Don't worry I sorted them out" Emmett huffed, annoyance heavy in his tone.

Quiet took over just as we all heard footsteps coming from the hallway, each of us went to our own business. Emeli begun cleaning up the bowl and hair brush, Emmett arranged my food on the movable table that he swung around in front of me to eat, and I decided to make and effort, absentmindedly started playing with the meat and bread on my plate.

The door opened and Snow stepped inside. Ordering for Emmett to leave, which he did without a word. He didn't even glance at Emeli when she came to stand at the side of my bed. Her presents making me relax into the cushions.

"Good morning Miss Everdeen" he beamed.

**That's the chapter! Please review and tell me what you think. The longer the reviews and the more reviews the quicker I update. Thank you for reading. MissKEverdeen:)**


	11. Chapter 11

**Always**

**Chapter 11**

**Thank you to everyone that reviewed my last chapter! I really appreciate and enjoy reading your reviews and thoughts :) I'm just glad that you are enjoying the story and would like you to know how much it means. Now it's taken me longer to write because I was busy all this week and I had to take some time to work out how far Katniss is into her pregnancy, anyway I finished it and please review and tell me what you think! MissKEverdeen:)**

One more long week had ticked by, where was this rescue mission? Snow was still angered but had decided to reattach me to my old friends- my beloved array of machines, wires and tubes. Since I stopped eating he thought it fit to force the nutrients into my ever –changing body. The thick white substance pumped into my system regularly, when I protested and snapped at the doctor protruding me to get the tube into my arm Snow hushed me. "It's the best for the baby" he smiled, the man's eyes lit up whenever we spoke of the baby.

I sighed defeated; it was the best for the baby. I was pregnant, and I desperately had understand that. To me the thought of being pregnant felt wrong and still now after everything. I still kept trying to convince myself it's all a lie, but with one stupid look down or a accidental brush of my hand over my slightly rounded belly I'm pulled to swiftly, to abruptly to the undeniable truth; I was having this baby, I was having Peeta's child whether I liked it or not. Whether I wanted to or not.

Of course over the long days, when I was left to my own entertainment my mind drifted. How was Peeta taking the news? What does he think of me having his child?

It was inevitable that my annoying mind would then stray to what could have been. How i would feel if I was pregnant out of choice. The truth is I had never wanted children, though everyone, even me at times thought me and Gale would marry and start a family. But over the last few months, after having to lie to everyone and the thought that I would have to marry Peeta and the 'fake' pregnancy I had come to one solid conclusion; if I must have children, Peeta would be my first choice for the father.

Like always I lay on the cold metal, awaiting a visit. The doors open, but I don't look up. One pair of heavy footsteps enter the room, he sits on the side of my bed. "Miss Everdeen" he beams.

My eyes look to his, their dark as night; untrustworthy and as black as his cold heart and soul alike. He proceeds to beam at me and I fear with every fibre in my being what grim thought is feeding his obvious uncharacteristic happiness.

"What?" I ask outwardly, my voice is small. It's like he can sense my fear and unease, as if it's a heady sent that permeates the air.

"I have a surprise for you today" he starts. My eyes harden. "Oh don't worry, it's a good surprise" he grins. Each of my blurring thoughts are telling me otherwise. He waves his hand at the guards by the door, the doors open. Giving entry to a young woman, effortlessly wheeling a machine into the room. The machine is white, with tubes and wires protruding from it. A keyboard and small black screen stick out at the front, while a larger screen stands on the top on a retractable arm.

The woman flashes me an unnaturally blinding white pearly smile. It doesn't look sincere or real in anyway, the turns me off her in mere seconds of us meeting. "Hello Miss Everdeen" she greets, laying on the overly kind tone a little too thick. I hold in a slight giggle as I unconsciously compare her tone to the horrendous amount of sickly green eye-makeup she's applied. Her choice of words makes me think for a second, nobody except Emeli ever called me by my first name, they were all to formal for my own taste.

"I'm Doctor Green, and I will be doing your first ultrasound today" she didn't even bother to look at me as she spoke, instead stared at Snow. Only looking to me when she had finished and sent me another smile.

I looked to Snow. When women were pregnant they would only be permitted one or two checks by professional doctors in which they would receive an ultrasound. I never understood what the check consisted of; my mother was never taught how or had the opportunity to handle one.

"Ok" I said, shifting awkwardly under my sheets so that I was sitting up properly. Doctor Green smiled again, then proceeded to pull the machine over to the left side of the large metal bed. I turned to Snow, was he going to stay here for this? He stood and walked around to the foot of my bed.

The woman motioned towards my covers and I stiffened. Snow waved his hand again, and I heard more footsteps. My muscles instantly relaxed at the site of my dear guard entering the room. She rounded the other side of the bed, pulling a chair behind her. When my eyes met hers she smiled warmly. The doctor lifted the covers of my stomach and folded them back neatly on the tops of my legs. Noticing my distress at being in a slightly vulnerable state, I felt Emeli grasp my hands claiming them in her warm ones and giving me a reassuring nod.

Cold hands brushed my stomach, looked to see the woman lift my dark green tank top up around my upper chest. She twirled around and grabbed a bottle. "I'm sorry if this is cold" she said, I nodded. She squeezed the bottle and a clue cold gel came out. Turning again she grasped a large object connected to the machine. "I will move this over your belly and we can get the image up on the screen" I nodded again. "Ok let's begin"

She pressed down and began to move the object over the round of my stomach. The doctor pressed some buttons and seconds later, the screen came to life before my eyes; grey lines appeared on the screen. A whooping sound filled the air. The screen showed up a small shape, which moved and mutated its form with every move of the woman's hand. I gasped when I realised; that was it, that was my baby. I felt Emeli grasp my hand tighter, even she was staring at the screen in wonder. My eyes turned to Snow who looked very pleased with the picture on the screen.

"So..." the woman's voice pulled my eyes back to the overwhelming picture on the screen. "This is the head, the body..." her voice went on with the explanation, I tried to listen but her words were easily lost in my mind as I stared at the first glimpse I would get of my child. A small shape in the middle of the baby's frame was moving; beating. Once again I gasped. Its heart was beating, it was real, I was really pregnant. My glorious baby was real, and I knew now that I wanted it.

The beating sound still sounded. "Is that its heartbeat?" I asked slowly. "That sound, is that its heartbeat?" I couldn't hold back the beaming smile fighting to spring across my normally emotionless face.

"Yes, it's a strong pattern for such a young foetus" Doctor Green confirmed. She looked to Snow. He nodded and she left.

"The doctors will be able to look over the scans to check if everything is correct, we will be able to get you a picture and I will keep the film"

Before I could say anything he got up and left. My hand was left on the bed and Emeli got up to clean off my stomach. "It's amazing isn't it?" she said quietly. She looked up and grinned. "It makes it all fell real doesn't it? Seeing it there, knowing it's there"

I nodded slowly, "It's unbelievable" I whispered. Once Emeli had finished, she pulled the chair closer and leaned over to me.

"Are you ok?" she asked. "I know all this could be a little overwhelming, it was only to make sure it's ok"

"Its fine, I'm fine" I whispered. "My baby's fine. That's all that matters now" my hand came up to brush over my belly and cradle it carefully. Emeli gave me another smile and I was sure she could see the loving tint deep in my eyes. Seeing it really did make it all real, I really was pregnant.

"What's happened to the rescue mission?" I asked outright, her smile vanished instantly. She looked down.

"Coin is still unsure" she said, my eyes hardened for the second time today. "She's waiting for the perfect time, when your less protected, so they have the best chance. For everyone to make it. Peeta's angry at her about it"

"She doesn't think I'm worth it, that I'm worth the risk" I said. She didn't reply.

"It will be soon Katniss, in the next couple of days"

**That's the chapter! Please review and tell me what you think. I promise not to leave it to long before updating again, I have work next week but I will try and update as soon as possible. Maybe in a few days. As always the more reviews you lovely lot leave and the longer the reviews the more motivated and the willing I am to write. I really appreciate your amazing support in my story. So review, review, review! Reading them always makes me smile and makes me happier, it really means a lot to me! MissKEverdeen:) **


	12. Chapter 12

**Always**

**Chapter 12**

**AUTHOR NOTE: IMPORTANT.**

**Thank you to everyone that reviewed my last chapter, I know my last authors note was stupid. I promise you I never meant to hurt, offend or insult any of you I was just unsure whether it was a good chapter or not and since I only received one review I was concerned that you were unhappy with the content. If you knew me in real life you would know just how paranoid and cautious I am about hurting people's feelings, I always try and make people happy. Before posting I thought it through again and again and again, contemplating your reaction to my authors note and I posted only on the fact that I wanted more feedback on the chapter, that's all I ask for is feedback on my writing or on the content of my chapters. it is completely up to you whether you review or not and I apologise for seeming pushy or anything.**

**The feedback I receive from all of you lovely readers helps me in my writing :) I have thought through all your comments and taken from them all. Though I won't be acquiring a beta because I'm unsure of how those work and I'm not sure I would be sure on how to approach it, anyway I will be trying to pay more attention to my spelling and grammar. It's just that usually I try and get chapters out as soon as possible and can't always get the time to read through them more than once or twice. Saying this I have read some Fanfictions when I to have become annoyed and frustrated with spellings and or grammar, mostly because many have been in text speak.**

**I thank you for your continued support in my story or stories and hope that my last authors note did not ruin the story or your perception of me personally.**

**Thank you for taking the time for reading this, I've tried my hardest to make the following chapter as long as possible. There is a POV switch in the middle to Peeta's many of you have wanted one and I have had this planned for awhile, I have also taken into account your thoughts on the characters and have tweaked the story accordantly, by the way Emeli and Emmett aren't based on anyone I know just people I put in so Katniss had someone :) hope you enjoy! MissKEverdeen:)**

Emeli sat by my side, as we talked both of us couldn't help but smile. I had become so close to her so quickly, I knew it had to do with the fact that she was all I had, the only connection I had to the outside world, to my family, to Peeta. She spoke so happily I had to question how she could stay so positive, so very strong in times like these. As her laughter faded and dispersed into the now silent air I had to ask, "Why did snow choose you for this job?" I asked a little to accusing then I meant. She gave me a questioning, surprised expression.

"What?" she asked confused.

"I don't mean to sound rude" I assured her, "I mean, did you choose to do this?"

"Yes" she answered simply. "He asked all female personnel, and I applied willingly"

"Was this before or after you started with Coin?"

"After" she replied sitting up straight.

"But why would you do that? Put yourself in danger?" I asked.

"Because, I have my Rose" she whispered. "I couldn't bear the thought of you going through this alone, but I wanted to end this. All of this..." she leaned over to pull my cold hands into her warm ones. "Katniss, I truly don't blame you for any of this. You were the one that ignited this war, but all you did was give people a chance. A chance for peace, an end of the hunger games. You might think all capitol citizens enjoy watching the children die, but that's not true. I can't bear to watch it, all I can think of is rose in that sort of situation" her face turned sad. "I want it to end, I want the pain to end and if I can help I will"

Thunderous footfalls flooded the hallway. Both our heads snapped up in an instant, shocked and more than ever terrified. Snows large frame stared through the glass, flanked by even rougher looking guards, they stood awaiting the all too familiar access sound. It beeped and the seemingly determined armada were granted access to my cell.

Snow practically charged for my bedside, "Out" he ordered at my personal guard in a harsh bark. Before Emeli could even process the order the two guards bombarded her, each constricting their meaty hands around her slender arms and literally dragging her out.

"What?! NO!" I screamed. Emeli shot me a pleading look, I was unsure whether it was one telling me to help her or keep my mouth shut, tight. Snow didn't even spare her a departing look, her now motionless, tense body was being pulled out the door and down the hall. My horrified expression was plastered on my face. I couldn't even look away from the door until the hard tone of President Snow filled my ears.

"Miss Everdeen" he hissed.

"Where are you taking her?" I asked, cutting him off.

"It doesn't matter to you what I do with my peacekeepers Miss Everdeen, she doesn't matter anymore" he hissed at me again, by now he was right up in my face. I could feel the irritation radiating of him. "I never liked her to begin with"

"Why? Is she too nice for you?" I asked, "Does she have such a good personality that it makes you want to be good for once?" I don't know whether it's my true thoughts finally finding a voice or the complicated concoction of hormones racing their way around my body but I couldn't hold back the words that fell from my mouth of their own accord. "Is that it?" I mocked him, a sly smile crept along my lips accompanying the comments I knew would get me in trouble just by themselves.

"Do not get all high and mighty with me Everdeen" the spite in his voice coming out thick and fast, "I can make your life a lot worse, do you wish for more people to die because of you? Or were your stupid friend and the Avox girl enough to show you I don't play around with matters like you?"

I really feel the need to spit in his face or leave a nice big mark on that surgically enhanced face of his. "What did you come here for?" I snarl.

"I have decided another interview is in order" he began to calm down, his breathing slowed and he went to sit down. Brushing of his always well presented suit and rearranging his white rose.

"Another interview?" I asked.

"The last one did nothing, if anything it made them fight harder" he answered. "I want to crush their hope; you are going to tell them to stop fighting for you"

I stared at him for a moment. "Apparently you're the one they follow, the face of their rebellion, I want you to stop that" he got up. "I want you to tell them to stop fighting for you, do you understand?"

I nodded.

10 minutes later I was led back down the hallway to Cinna's room. This time when I entered he was waiting for me. He looked even skinnier; as he turned to me I flinched. There were fresh bruises clouding his cheek and head in purple blotches. More marks and cuts run down the length of his visible arms. "Katniss" he hummed into my neck as we embraced.

"Cinna" I whispered, tears sprang to my eyes at the felling of false safety I felt in his arms, anyone in the room could take him in his fragile state, but his still warm embrace warmed me inside and out with love and comfort.

The guards left, but I knew they would stand outside. Ready to attack if needed. "Ok, where do you want me first?" I asked, falling almost too easily into our regular routine.

"Snow has certain thoughts for you for this interview" he answered. He walked over to the podium and I followed, stepping up and expecting him to bring out my outfit for my exception. Instead he brought out a few bowls and cloths.

"What costume am I wearing this time?" I questioned confused.

"What you're wearing now" he said. I looked down at the now wore tank top and shorts. My eyebrows furrowed, the rest of my features must have followed to suit as Cinna looked up at my expression.

"Snow doesn't want you all prettied up for this interview" he explained, "Quite the opposite actually" he bent at the waist to grab a ratty old cloth and proceed to drench it in one of the bowls contents.

I still sat confused as he applied my make-up, he didn't bother to re-do or even wash my hair which had become knotted and greasy. Once he was down he granted me one look in the mirror. I was shocked at his work; the gape of my mouth only seemed to enhance the make-up. Purple powder had to been skilfully smeared to deepen the look of my sleepless eyes, somehow he was able make my cheeks look shallow and bony. I was beginning to understand my look, putting two and two together in my head.

"There it's done" Cinna cooed, standing back like he usually would to admire his work. This time he looked sad and slightly shocked. For what he had done I was sure I looked amazing.

The door opened and Snow walked in, he stopped steps before me and nodded assuring at my talented personal stylist. "It's amazing, good work Cinna" Snow smiled. "Ok, it's time" he said.

I began to make my way over to the door. Cinna followed. "Just one more thing to make it perfect" Snow said as I neared him. Before I could react his hand raised and hit me straight across the face. Cinna came up from behind to catch me as I stumbled back from the force. His hands found my back to hold me. My own hand came up to hold my now throbbing cheek, wetness trickled over my fingers and I realised, he had broken my lower lip. A small stream of red dribbled from the burst flesh. My cheeks surface still stung, with a wipe of the back of my hand most of the blood was gone but I was sure it had begun to set. Still visible, but that's what he wanted. "There the finishing touch" Snow sneered.

I said nothing as he left the room, expecting me to follow. I did and we came to the side of the stage. "You won't be going on like you did before" Snow said. I looked at him both confused and terrified.

The Flickerman music started and the blinding bright lights went up. It revealed me, chained my wrists to the stage. I grimaced at what I was sure they saw. My make-up paired with my outfit. My tank top was marred with a smearing of red, browned perfectly to resemble blood. Brown and black dirt and grime was rubbed over both my clothes and showing limbs. Cinna was even able to mimic large horrific bruises, set in a near rainbow of shades. It was all too clear to me, the story of my transformation. I was no longer a guest in the careful hands of the Capitol, but a prisoner in their iron like clutches.

**Peeta Pov**

Another crowd was rushing towards command. Like before I knew exactly what was happening. Katniss was back, she was being interviewed once again, I hoped to see her the way she was before. Harm free and as beautiful as ever, I knew like everyone else this wouldn't be the case.

I stopped dead in my tracks when my eager eyes found her. She was chained like an animal to the stage she stood on. The silver clinks probably only permitted her to move a few steps in each direction, but she chose to step as far away from the spotlight as possible, trying to shrink back into the darkness the back of the stage provided.

Flickerman sauntered onto the stage, taking his usual bow and greedily soaking up the rioting applause. "Good evening ladies and gentleman" he called out into the crowd, earning another round of applause. He turned to the camera and smiled, "We are welcoming on our dear nation's sweetheart again tonight" he announced, thought we could all see Katniss already there with him.

My eyes bored into his head as he turned and made his way over to the chair which had been placed a few feet away from her. As soon as her olive toned face had made the camera my eyes never left hers.

"Good evening Katniss" he greeted. Even he couldn't put a good spin on the situation; his face slightly fell with the acknowledgement of the love of my life. He didn't dare look her straight in the eye, her grey orbs looked guarded, though it was obvious at least to me that she was trying her best to stay calm.

She didn't answer, just looked at him for a moment. The silence panned out, creating offset awkward tone on stage. Soon enough Caesar's professional hosting skills kicked in and he attempted to rectify the situation. "Well it's good to have you back" he grinned widely, ignoring her decor for as long as possible. "I do hope that the development of the child is progressing" he commented with another smile.

"Yes" she whispered, low enough for the camera crew to have to zero in on her further.

"I hear you had your first look at the darling baby a few days ago" Caesar's voice brightened at the thought of my unborn child.

"Yes" Katniss whispered again.

"How far are you along now?" he asked, "Almost three months?"

"Yes" Katniss nodded. I could tell all she wanted to do was sit there and test out just how restrictive her binds were.

"Not far enough along to reveal the gender though I understand" he frowned. The stage went silent again, that was until a loud whooping sound was heard echoing through the speakers.

Everyone's eyes shot to the stage wide screen that light up behind Katniss. Grey lines marred the screen, and then it refocused. My breath left my mouth in a loud gasp at what I saw. The tiny body of my child mutated and moulded in and out of shape. The next breath leaving my body caught in my throat, every nerve in my body felt frozen. That changing mass, the one that seemed to even contain what I could guess, was a beating heart was my child, mine and Katniss' child.

Katniss' reaction was far different than mine though, she turned slowly to face the screen. When she turned back to see the faces of the Capitol, all going through rounds and rounds of awww's and ohhh's, her face looked broken. She looked destroyed at the reaction of the audience, at the first thought about our child. Soon though that sadness turned to anger, just as the whooping of my child's heartbeat began to fade and the screen went dark, her expression turned determined.

There was a faint yelling, her head turned for less than a few seconds before she was back to the crowd. Her features still contorted in determination she took one confident step forward, into the spotlight. Katniss gave one surveying glance before her mouth opened.

"Do not fight for me" she said, louder than I thought she had the courage to. "Don't fight for me, fight for my child. Fight for your children. They deserve freedom, we all do. From poverty, from pain, from the hunger games"

Everyone had gone silent, even everyone in command. "I don't know what will happen to me when this child is born" her voice went sad; her hands came up to cradle and stroke the slight bump where her stomach was. "But I need to know that there is at least a chance that it, he, she, I don't know. Will be safe from the danger I was put into" she looks down at her stomach for a second than back up, straight down the camera. "I need you to fight, we need to win"

By this time Snow was yelling of camera to get the station shut down, Coin ordered Beetee to hack the network. The screen went fuzzy for moments before she was back, then of then on again. "Keep her on the screen" Coin shouted, he started typing franticly on his computer. Clicking wildly, and pressing buttons. It was a full blown network war.

Finally she stayed on the screen. "If something happens to me and the baby survives, I want them to go to my family" she barely whispered. Men were running towards her, others were trying to turn of the cameras. Just as the men grabbed her arms, unchaining her and dragging her away, she looked straight at the last camera. "And Peeta, I love you" she screamed. "Always..." the camera cut off and she was gone.

Command went silent once again, each person unable to speak. I turned to look around, many were still shocked. Haymitch and Finnick were in despair, and Gale looked heartbroken. My legs walked of their own accord out of the room and down the hallway. I needed to get as far away from her as possible before everything really sunk in.

**Thanks for reading, please read the authors note above. MissKEverdeen:)**


	13. Chapter 13

**Always**

**Chapter 13**

**Thank you to everyone that reviewed my last chapter! I know it's been longer than I usually go before updating, but I'm back at school again, it's my last year meaning tones of homework and probably exams so I won't be able to update regularly but I will try my best. I'm averaging another 10 or so chapters for always. By the way as I said in my authors note last time I will not be acquiring a beta, but it was recently explained to me that 'foetus' is the English way of spelling it and I am English so that's probably were I got it from, if I spell words differently to you I'm sorry but I'm sticking to the English way. Anyway little rant over; I hope you enjoy the next chapter! MissKEverdeen:)**

Strong hands gripped my arms like vices, dragging me down a hallway I had never seen before, and to the door of a room I was uncertain I would ever leave. Alive. With a powerful shove from both guards I was sent crashing to the floor of what I would defiantly call a cell. My head and back hit something solid; the wall. Through the pulled out loose strands of hair I looked round to see that the space I was in was nothing more than a couple of times my size. My hands came up instinctively to protect my stomach, pulling my legs in at the knee. I tried to make myself as small as possible, dragging my tired body so that I was as far from the guards as I can be.

Stomping footfalls rampage through the hallway and I know its him, my movements were stupid as I'm pulled by my hair to stand. Snow holds onto my hair, using it like strings on a puppet. My own hands come up to claw at his but my tries are futile. With one swift flex of his arm my face is inches, more like a nose width away from his. The putrid stench of blood and roses assault my senses and like always I want to spit in his face.

His eyes look like they're on fire, the anger is pure and radiating from every pore. "What you did was stupid" he hissed, another strong whiff of blood hits my nose and I fear I'm close to passing out. "Do you like people dying for you Miss Everdeen? I have told you time and time again. I have shown you time and time again what I can and will do to keep control of people"

"I did exactly what you said!" I verbally spit in his face. "I told them not to fight for _me_!" my sneering tone paired with what must look like the smuggest and most spitefully smile I could muster, is just asking for death.

"Do not get smart with me Katniss Everdeen!" he snaps back just as spiteful, his hand twists to knot my dark hair further around his hand and I can't help but yelp in pain. The sound makes his frown falter into a smile of satisfaction. "You know I think I've been too nice to you up till now Miss Everdeen, I've given you food, health checks, a darling baby" his eyes wander to my stomach, instantly my eyes narrow.

"I never asked for this child" I whisper.

"No, but I gave you it anyway. You know this was going to happen sometime, if you lived" he smiles, his grip loosens and I'm free. "The lie would always have to be upheld, the wedding would have only have been the start"

"So you gave me his child? Now after the games, with the rebellion?"

"From the moment I saw you to together after that first games, I was sure there was something there. That you did indeed care for the boy"

"Oh so that's it" I sneered. "Did I finally do it Snow? Did I finally convince _you_?"

"Of course you did" he said, "You just convinced the whole of Panem with your deep love for him"

He walks so he's standing in the doorway. "Does it make it all harder Miss Everdeen?" I look at him confused. "Finally realising you love him, when you know deep down... it's too late"

The door closes and I'm left in darkness. The roots of my hair still sting and I'm pretty sure that there are bruises started to form on my back. What have I done? Did I just make it worse? Would he kill again? Would I have to watch as he kills Cinna? Or Emeli?

**Its short but I will be uploading in a few days because I'm really not fond of the number 13 ;) chapter 14 will probably be up by Sunday. Review if you wish. MissKEverdeen:)**


	14. Chapter 14

**Always**

**Chapter 14**

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed! As promised I have written my next chapter and updated. Don't worry I don't plan on giving up with this story; I hate it when people don't finish a chapter. anyway so this is the next chapter and I won't be able to update till next week when I have time, schools really annoying me. Hope you enjoy! MissKEverdeen:)**

Two days passed. The only way I knew this was from the two small meals and water I was given daily. Other than my lack of nutrition the constant alarm of footsteps outside the heavy metal door made it difficult to sleep. My hunting senses were overly heightened by the fact that I didn't know what Snow was thinking of doing with me. Only at my meal time would I ever see light, the rest of the time I was in complete darkness.

My head rested against the hard solid wall. I sat for hours on end in the same cornor, staring into the darkness. The sleepy haze hung over me, heaving my eyelids and willing me into unconsciousness. I couldn't fall asleep. I was afraid I would never wake up, or if I did what I would wake up to. My head drooped, for seconds I gave in. then suddenly the footsteps came again.

I was sent back to being alert, the blood pumping thick and fast through my veins. The footfalls stopped in front of my cell, the sound of someone pressing in the code made me back further into the wall. The door opened to reveal Emmett.

"Well are you just going to sit there or are you actually going to run?" he barked bending to drag me too my feet. "Get up!" he hissed, dragging me out of the cell.

"Whats going on?" I asked hastily as we hurried down the hallway, him still holding onto my arm.

"What do you think is happening Everdeen?" he yelled. "Your precious lover boys come to rescue you" His words rush through my head and it takes me longer than it should of before they click into place.

"Peeta" I whisper.

"Yes" he answers. "We have to hurry; I've left the control room empty. We only have a matter of minutes before the next guard comes to check the patrol"

"Where are we going?" I ask now freely running down the hallway. I was still a bit slow but the adrenaline was getting into me.

"We have to meet Emeli and the others in the next corridor, she was able to free the prisoners but I had to get you" we round the next corner and there they are.

"Emeli" I cry running to her. We catch each other in a quick embrace. "They are coming! The rescue mission"

"I know Katniss, we have to go now!"

I look to everyone; Johanna looks bruised and battered, Annie was just a bit grubby and Enobaria was fine. Cinna wrapped me in his arms.

"We have to go" he whispered. I nodded and we were off running. The sound of gun shots awakened the air, the next thing was the ear splitting alarm that was so loud you could feel the vibrations racking in your bones. Every movement is so fast you could hardly catch your breath.

"They're here, they are in the building!" Emmett yelled from the back of the group. "We have to get to the back entrance before Snow sends out the rest of the guards"

We hit a flight of stairs and practically lunge up the steps. Johanna's hands come out to support and push me forward when my legs begin to buckle. "Thank you" I said.

"Your welcome" she barks lowly.

We're on the ground floor, that's all I know. Running footfalls come from the other direction; both Emmett and Emeli raise their guns. We all begin to back away but men dressed in grey turn the corner and both our guards seem to relax slightly. Peeta and Finnick follow and my heart sinks. "Peeta" I whisper. My legs speed up and I wrap my arms around him.

"Katniss" he whispers into my hair.

Tears spring to my eyes and all I want is to stay here, in his arms forever. Even now in his embrace I feel the safety I felt in the cave. "Im not trying to be rude but can you two can it for a second, imitate death and all" Finnick says quietly.

We both lean back and nod. Reality sets in and again we are running. Peeta's holding my hand so tightly I'm pretty sure my circulation is getting cut off, but I don't care. Loud stomping echoes from the other end of the corridor behind us, it does nothing but propel us forward. "We're not going to make it" Emmett barked from the front of the group now, he looks back at us all and then glances behind us.

"Get to that door now" Emeli yells pointing to the large door about 10 feet away. Emmett stops at the side and presses in the code. The large corridor width door slides up and we're under and passed it in record time. "Go!" Emeli called as we all raced ahead. I looked back to see her on the other side of the door with a full armada of soldiers coming towards her and us.

"Emeli" I scream. The group including Emmett are too far ahead to stop her before she presses in the code. I turn on my heel and sprint for the door. "No! NO! NO! EMELI!" I scream at the top of my lungs. I see her send me a teary smile before the metal door goes down. "No!" I cry beating my fists against the door. "Emeli..." I shout.

From behind the door I hear the gun war, thunderous groans of men, a bloodcurdling scream and the unmistakeable thud of a body hitting the metal door. "Emeli" I sob.

A strong hand grasps my shoulder. I look up to see Emmett looking down at me. "This is your fault" he hisses. "This is all your fault" the grief-stricken look on his face, the devastation in his eyes further weighs down my heart with guilt. The tears drop and I take his words willingly. "She died for you, to save your life"

"Than don't let it be in vain" Finnick ordered. "Don't fight now and let them come and kill us"

Emmett looks down infuriated. He turns with disgust and starts walking slowly towards the group and towards are exit. Peeta runs over to pick me up. "Im so sorry Katniss" he whispers. The tears stop long enough for me to look at him confused. Why should he be sorry? I'm the reason she's dead. She was a sister, a mother. A mother. What was going to happen to Rosalie? Was she going to die too?

The thoughts leave me feeling numb. I'm only slightly aware of Peeta's strong arms around me, guiding me along and my legs moving of their own accord. Every second is set in slow motion, every breath feels like a heaving pant, the guilt still heavy.

The corridor shakes, sending us into the walls and crashing to the floor. "What is that?" Annie screams.

"It's the justice buildings self destruct system, Snow doesn't want us to get out alive" Emmett yelled. "He's bringing it down; we only have a few minutes"

The next shake is far more violent and it takes longer for us to get to our feet. The stomping begins again and fear rises within me. My footing goes weird, one last violent quake and I'm sent to the floor one more time. The hit makes me dizzy; I feel the blood drip down from my head. I groan in pain, and instinctively my hand comes up to protect my womb. Then everything goes black.

**That's the chapter! Please tell me what you think! MissKEverdeen:)**


	15. Chapter 15

Authors note

I'm sorry about not updating its not the story I have lots of work to do at school and have exams this week and next week if I have the time I hope to update but right now I'm really busy.


	16. Guess what? Authors note

Authors note

I'm sorry for the long delay, though in my last update I said that I wouldn't stop writing till I was finished I have unfortunately decided to discontinue Always. I'm sorry but as I have very little time to write and most of all I have somewhat fallen out of love with the hunger games fanfiction. I'm sorry for not posting this early and apologise to all that have recently started reading. I don't like the idea of completely leaving this so I offer an idea. At the start of this story I had lots of ideas for this story so I would like to write one last proper chapter an epilogue of sorts and for this I acquire the name of their son. Yes, they were to have a daughter this was to be revealed in the next chapter, the name of which is already decided.

So if you like this idea and would like me to write this chapter which would feature flashbacks and a last part with Katniss and Peeta then please review or PM me! Along with your vote of name, the one I like the best will be in it. P.S the boys full name would end in Cinna Mellark.

So please tell me what you think, MissKeverdeen:)


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